Relationships are productive for most parties involved. Some may be negative but soon seize to be relationships then. Or at least they need to. Why would somebody want to stay in a negative realtionship? It is human nature to resist change and it is that which causes us to ignore what we know to be correct and continure negative situations. So does that mean we are incappable of ending a realtionship? Hell no it doesn't. We make a choice based on our predetermined genetic make up to resist the change. So what is the deal?
Relationships are formed when two people form an allegiance to each other by whatever means and or reasons. Most of the time these are between a man and a woman. That is what comes to mind for most people first. However relationships are formed every time we interact with another person. Check out line at the store with the clerk. Short business realtionship. Holding the elevator door for another person. Short human relationship. The people you work with and for. Usually long productive business realtionships.
For men and women realtionship means many different things when first brought to mind. To most it is a man and a woman who are involved personally with each other. But really it is a short realtionship extended for an undetermined amount of time for reasons of mutual pleasure. When one is lonley, uncomfortable alone, attracted to another, nice to each other. Mutual interests are the begining of lasting realationships. How many people do you stay friends with (in a realtionship) when there is nothing in common with the two of you. Not very long but often times we go ahead and try. Why in the hell would we do that? Sex is the main reason two people continue with the realationship even though nothing else about them is compatable. So why not just have sex and leave the relationship out of it? For some reason it is easier said than done.
How many marriages end on the basis of incompatability? Most of them. I would dare to say 90% of them. So how long does it take to figure that out? Not long really, pride, fear, egos, and selfcontrol are the main blocks to ending something that is no longer productive. Human emotion dictates most actions made in each one of our lives. Take the emotion out and you take the human element out. That sounds disgusting to me.
As people age they change. Changes in their wants, needs, attractions, and beliefs. As people change they need to realize that change is a constant and work with it not against it. Do you like hamburger every day? Maybe a couple of days you can live with it but not forever. Something different because your appetite has changed. No different for people liking other people. The change needs to be discussed continually to deter negative impacts in the future. No reason changing people can't stay in a realtionship, they just have to work on it.
Now communication is probably the worlds hardest task while at the same time the most important. If I can't tell you that I have changed and don't like going out every weekend then something negative will happen. For all I know you feel the same way but are scared to tell me because you don't want to hurt me. The complete relationship could end just because somebody was too chickent to speak up and voice their opinions.
I am well aware I don't enjoy the same things I did ten years ago. Do I tell my friends of twenty years about this. Usually not so we drift apart. However if I communicated with them my desires that have changed something could be changed in the realationship to impact both parties positively. Doing nothing is always worse than doing something. Voices of men don't kill, actions of silent men kill. Silence is so negative when building or keeping a relationship. Communication is our key to survival. We are the only species with comprehensive communication skills. That is what sets us apart from the other animals on the planet.
Would there be a posibility to gain a relationship without comunicating. No, in reality not at all. So why the hell is it so hard for so many of us to communicate with each other? No one likes to feel pain, no one want to hurt or be hurt. One simple action can ease the pain and that is communication!!!!!!! We learn to communicate before we can do anything else. It is how our personal needs are met. It is how we survive in the world. However, it is the one thing if left out of any relationship will destroy it.
What happens when we communicate our feelings to the other partty but they do not listen or pay attention to it. Then all you are doing is talking, not communicating. Communication is an exchange of words, signals, or noises between two parties. Written, spoken, sung, yelled, whispered or however you choose to share something with another is communicating. Now does that really seem to be a difficult task. Sometimes it is harder than anything else when you know it will cause pain but you still have to do it.
Our lives depend on communication to survive on this planet and beyond. Without communication the human race would become extinct. Knowing this and realizing the severity weighing on communicatioin, should be reason enough for us all to learn better ways to communicate. Could you imagine not having the facilities about yourself to communicate. Not only would you be an outcast but you life would fail. No means to inform others your needs and or want. You dont have to talk to communicate. Women are better at getting a point across without speaking but they do communicate with facial expressions.
When your dog barks at you do you think it is communicating? Sure it is. Now not knowing the language of dogs we are left to guess at understanding their crude communications. However there is no common language or whatever to understand exactly what they want or need. It is figured out by trial and error. Do you want out, do you want food? In a relationship with an animal lots of guess work is applied. Without a common language humans and animals have basic instinct relationships.