Telling the Parents?

[JVlifeonstandby]

So, my parents have no idea I wish to be a transvestite (one of the reasons for my thread asking about panties shopping). I wanted to know: How could I tell my parents? This is only a last resort, I'll only do it when necessary. Although, I'd prefer to get my hands on womens clothing/panties in my size somehow & wear them when they're not around (keep it a secret)..... I know that is most likely impossible though...

[JVlifeonstandby]

Well, considering nobody answered, it must be a lost cause... :_(

[deuxglass]

I never told them.

It was don't ask don't tell. My household was not very warm in that. I had to find my "touchy, feely experience elsewhere. When I was on my own I felt liberation.

[Foxy Basket]

Three words - just do it!

When I decided to come out to my family and friends, I tried a variety of tactics, depending on the person. Some were more informed than others, but I found the best course of action was to keep things simple.

This was my general approach:

"Ok, there's no easy way to say this, so I'm just going to spit it out. I'm a transsexual, and I'm planning to transition from male to female. Any questions?"

Obviously the questions varied from person to person, depending on how close we were, and how much they knew about the subject. I tried to be as honest and direct as possible, and try to make them feel comfortable asking anything. After all, if they didn't ask, they might end up stuck with misconceptions - this was my first, and best, opportunity to explain the situation, and I didn't want anything left unsaid.

Parents are a little bit trickier. The first response of both my parents was, "You're still my child, and I love you no matter what" - which was followed immediately by "Are you out of your fucking mind?!?!?!"

My mom had an easier time of it than my dad - part of that is a cultural thing (my mom's from San Francisco, and my dad is from Athens, Greece) but also, my mom doesn't consider being female to be a weakness. My dad, as much as I love him, still maintains a lot of old-fashioned gender values, and doesn't show women the same respect; so, going from the stronger gender to the weaker one is something he just doesn't understand. It's not his fault, it's just the way he sees the world; it's not up to me to change his mind.

It was almost a year before he was willing to "see" me as I am now, but slowly, he's been coming around. My parents knew me one way for 26 years, and they've known me this way for less than two - I can understand that they need time to adjust. After all, it took me a lifetime to accept it myself - the least I can do is give them the same courtesy.

So, my advice (for what little it's worth) is to be honest, direct, and don't sugar-coat it. People tend to respect you more when you're straight-up with them. But also, don't expect them to shift gears immediately; it could be many years before they come to accept you for who you are.

Good luck!

[JVlifeonstandby]

When I decided to come out to my family and friends, I tried a variety of tactics, depending on the person. Some were more informed than others, but I found the best course of action was to keep things simple.

This was my general approach:

"Ok, there's no easy way to say this, so I'm just going to spit it out. I'm a transsexual, and I'm planning to transition from male to female. Any questions?"

Obviously the questions varied from person to person, depending on how close we were, and how much they knew about the subject. I tried to be as honest and direct as possible, and try to make them feel comfortable asking anything. After all, if they didn't ask, they might end up stuck with misconceptions - this was my first, and best, opportunity to explain the situation, and I didn't want anything left unsaid.

Parents are a little bit trickier. The first response of both my parents was, "You're still my child, and I love you no matter what" - which was followed immediately by "Are you out of your fucking mind?!?!?!"

My mom had an easier time of it than my dad - part of that is a cultural thing (my mom's from San Francisco, and my dad is from Athens, Greece) but also, my mom doesn't consider being female to be a weakness. My dad, as much as I love him, still maintains a lot of old-fashioned gender values, and doesn't show women the same respect; so, going from the stronger gender to the weaker one is something he just doesn't understand. It's not his fault, it's just the way he sees the world; it's not up to me to change his mind.

It was almost a year before he was willing to "see" me as I am now, but slowly, he's been coming around. My parents knew me one way for 26 years, and they've known me this way for less than two - I can understand that they need time to adjust. After all, it took me a lifetime to accept it myself - the least I can do is give them the same courtesy.

So, my advice (for what little it's worth) is to be honest, direct, and don't sugar-coat it. People tend to respect you more when you're straight-up with them. But also, don't expect them to shift gears immediately; it could be many years before they come to accept you for who you are.

Good luck!

I just wish there was a way I could get female clothes & things when theyre not around....just to see what it's like....but I don't know how to get them without my parents being aware

[Rose]

How old are you? If you're past legal age, then it shouldn't be a huge problem. Just hide them somewhere in your room, if you don't want them finding out.

[toban]

Could be dangerous Rose, unless he plays safe and > > > >

How old are you? If you're past legal age, then it shouldn't be a huge problem. Just hide them somewhere in your room, if you don't want them finding out.

> > > has a secure place to put them, like in a locked suitcase etc.

Mother may find them, quite by accident, while she's on one of her sporadic clean-up streaks, when she may move everything around to capture the elusive dust bunnies under his bed or maybe just tidying up his closet or looking for clothes that need washing etc. You just never know when!

[lorenqt]

I didn't have to worry about telling my parents, they kinda walked in on me one day.
They had left for the day, so I got dressed up like a schoolgirl and I called my neighbor to come over. (He first introduced me to the wonderful world of crossdressing.) He came over and we were sitting on the couch. We were kissing, and then I started sucking his cock. When out of nowhere my parents came back. Needless to say they were surprised.

[JVlifeonstandby]

I didn't have to worry about telling my parents, they kinda walked in on me one day.
They had left for the day, so I got dressed up like a schoolgirl and I called my neighbor to come over. (He first introduced me to the wonderful world of crossdressing.) He came over and we were sitting on the couch. We were kissing, and then I started sucking his cock. When out of nowhere my parents came back. Needless to say they were surprised.

I would think they would be.....how did they take it?

[lorenqt]

I would think they would be.....how did they take it?

They weren't happy. They made me get rid of all my girrly cloths and my dildos. They treaten to prosecute the ,(I was under age at the time) if he didn't move. They wouldn't even talk to me for a month.
We've gotten past it now. I don't think they approve of my dressing, but it doesn't come up anymore.