Tia Phoenixx: reasons of transition: instinct, acceptance or simply a strategic decision?

[TSd8]

The new you to be verse

I like just the way you are.... I hope you actually do appreciate the Input....I figured you had it all together, the last time we spoke.... having decided to use natural (homeopathic) hormone therapies... You were great as both top and bottom & seemed to really enjoy who you were.

You're about to be someone different now. Best of luck

[

I'm the kind of person who appreciate constructive input

cheers

[/QUOTE]

[TSd8]

Input...Hopefully it doesn't have to be smoke up your...

I like just the way you are.... I hope you actually do appreciate the Input....I figured you had it all together, the last time we spoke.... having decided to use natural (homeopathic) hormone therapies... You were great as both top and bottom & seemed to really enjoy who you were.

You're about to be someone different now. Best of luck

[

I'm the kind of person who appreciate constructive input

cheers

[/QUOTE]

[Tia Phoenixx]

I like just the way you are.... I hope you actually do appreciate the Input....I figured you had it all together, the last time we spoke.... having decided to use natural (homeopathic) hormone therapies... You were great as both top and bottom & seemed to really enjoy who you were.

You're about to be someone different now. Best of luck

[

I'm the kind of person who appreciate constructive input

cheers

[/QUOTE]


I'm speechless...you even remember our last conversation about me taking natural hormones therapy? That's been years!

I'm very careful with regards to what I do with my body and face.
I'm NOT going to destroy what I've already had, I'm going to eliminate a little imperfection here and there.
The feminization surgery i'm going to have will correct my facial bone structure a little bit, so everything: my eyes, nose, my lips, my smile.. will remain the same. The surgery will be very subtle, you guys probably will not take notice on it. I may just appear prettier and fresher, that's all on the face.

The body: the breast. I will have tear drop, medium profile, silicone based (the softest version, called gummy bear implant ), under the muscle so my nipples will remain sensitive, full C cup. So the breast will be full, soft, bigger, natural looking but yet not too big and will not look fake.

Last but not the least, I'm going to do fat transfer/fat grafting in order to give curvier/hour glass figure around my hips. The butt will remain the same. I like my butt, so it will be the same, but the area around the butts will become smoother. This might come later next year after the first surgery performed successfully.

All in all, I will appear more feminine, sexier, healthier AND most importantly I will still have this natural looking and healthy/athletic look that i currently have...just better
Trust me...i hate fake looking tgirls too. I will not be like that. I promise.
I love the way I am now too...but a little better look does not hurt right?
The intention of my feminization surgery is NOT to change but to IMPROVE and to ENHANCE of what i've already had

[Tia Phoenixx]

an e-mail from a true tgirl admirer

Here is an extremely honest response I've received from a true tgirl admirer, who like ts women above any gender, posted as a comment on my latest blog entry
Profound and honest. I wish I meet this kind of man someday

http://www.tia-phoenixx.com/node/3339#comments

So ladies....don't give up searching..I almost did...but after reading this...o well...i'd better still open my door lol

[tslisaparadise]

the answer is yes for the read highlighted sentence.

Interesting and unusual, but yet honest response Jane.

If I read this 3 years ago, I would agree with you.

But everybody is getting older. Tgirl who is unique and one of a kind can only be popular in her teen or early 20s. We can see this type of girl on the internet often.

How about if she is a 55 years old transgender? Don't you think she will be happier if she becomes more passable?
I've never heard or read a transgender who is "unique" in her physical attributes but yet happy in her personal life. There is a chance that she might be lonely at that age, don't you think?

you all make great points but we all have our own reasons and our own timetables to do what we do and really who are we to judge such a personal thing,i really really hope nobody transitions for somebody else other than themselves or there in for a world of hurt for sure,anyways Tia you look amazing keep up the good work.

[Ray]

Lisa, retirement has mellowed you and I guess that is a good thing. I can remember a time when you sat at my table and I told you I was thinking of seeing Tia and your response was something like, if you see Tia I won't see you anymore. I'm glad you are enjoying your retirement and I really do miss you. Still buying all those sexy shoes?

[Tia Phoenixx]

you all make great points but we all have our own reasons and our own timetables to do what we do and really who are we to judge such a personal thing,i really really hope nobody transitions for somebody else other than themselves or there in for a world of hurt for sure,anyways Tia you look amazing keep up the good work.

thanks Lisa, I wish you the best for the entire of your life

[Tia Phoenixx]

Lisa, retirement has mellowed you and I guess that is a good thing. I can remember a time when you sat at my table and I told you I was thinking of seeing Tia and your response was something like, if you see Tia I won't see you anymore. I'm glad you are enjoying your retirement and I really do miss you. Still buying all those sexy shoes?

We both forgive and forget..life it too short to hold a grudge towards other people.

[Rockheart]

you all make great points but we all have our own reasons and our own timetables to do what we do and really who are we to judge such a personal thing,i really really hope nobody transitions for somebody else other than themselves or there in for a world of hurt for sure,anyways Tia you look amazing keep up the good work.

WTF!?

Golf season must be over.

In fact I know it is because i lost like 17 balls in the leaves the other day.
Time to give up for the season.

[tslisaparadise]

WTF!?

Golf season must be over.

In fact I know it is because i lost like 17 balls in the leaves the other day.
Time to give up for the season.

naaa its not over yet my friend lol did ya miss me yet? I played a lot this year well ove 100 rounds played today shot 76 from the blues not too bad for this old gal

[Rockheart]

naaa its not over yet my friend lol did ya miss me yet? I played a lot this year well ove 100 rounds played today shot 76 from the blues not too bad for this old gal

Sure i miss ya.

I shot 114 a couple weeks ago which is one of my best scores ever.
I got about 20 rounds plus at least 50 visits to the driving range.

And i still suck!

Blues, showoff.

[tslisaparadise]

Sure i miss ya.

I shot 114 a couple weeks ago which is one of my best scores ever.
I got about 20 rounds plus at least 50 visits to the driving range.

And i still suck!

Blues, showoff.

next year call me when your coming to Toronto and ill give you a free lesson so you can atleast shoot in the 80s k

[Rockheart]

next year call me when your coming to Toronto and ill give you a free lesson so you can atleast shoot in the 80s k

It's not possible.
I had a free lesson from the former president of the CPGA and I still suck worse than ever.
Not to mention I worked at a golf course for 8 years.

[TSFantasia]

Unquestioning Support or Devil's Advocate?

I guess on this subject and being on other TG/TS support and interests forums I sometimes wonder where the balance is with regards to giving unquestioning support to every person, who pops up and says they feel like they are a MtF or FtM trans, and at times being the devil's advocate to individuals?

I mean when you see some very young (teen years) and those who are older 50+ ,who are talking about wanting to begin their transition journey. Ideally starting transition younger is better in terms of the effectiveness of HRT but people in their teens often experience and go though many different phases, confusion over personal identity, sexuality, etc. Some also say they will lose their friends and be estranged from their families if they do. Others are too quick to immediately encourage them to proceed regardless of the consequences as it "will all be worth it to be yourself". There are those who are older and are talking about risking their marriages, jeapardizing their careers in order to be themselves again with similar overly optimist comments and compliments and unquestioning support.

I usually just try to ask practical questions and making practical suggestions concerning getting referred to a therapist specializing in gender identity issues by their GP. So they can clarify in their own minds what and why they are feeling the way they are and to know what course of action to take. I don't really know the person's state of mind or life circumstances. I don't like to make overly optimistic comments and give unquestioning support. At times with those who PM me directly at times I do play the devil's advocate at times asking them the why? and have you thought about? questions.

My concern for many that while in meeting one of the Maslow's hierarchy of basic human needs. That of self-actualization and self-esteem in being able to embrace their gender identity they may lose too much in the other underlying foundational human needs. Happiness and fulfillment in life is more than sitting in front a mirror telling ourselves we look pretty and sitting in support groups and having others agree.

[Tia Phoenixx]

\

My concern for many that while in meeting one of the Maslow's hierarchy of basic human needs. That of self-actualization and self-esteem in being able to embrace their gender identity they may lose too much in the other underlying foundational human needs. Happiness and fulfillment in life is more than sitting in front a mirror telling ourselves we look pretty and sitting in support groups and having others agree.

I'm working on my self actualization right now: problem solving and acceptance of facts, realizing that life is not fair, but yet, we can make our life better by:
1. (first) understanding the problems and challenges.
2. finding (the best) solutions and alternatives
3. to create or to be a better self (our life's final destination)

Being a tgirl is a challenge for some of us. For me, this stage is a transient stage to my final destination as a woman.
Realizing that this is a journey and the journey is definitely not easy. I have to choose the best solutions and alternatives for my future.

In other words, our future (and happiness) relies on how carefully we choose those solutions and alternatives. If we choose the best ones, then we will be the happiest, if not, we might be miserable.

Wisdom and careful thoughts are needed.


Here I'm in the best hotel in Stamford, ready to meet its wealthy residents
I feel blessed, but yet, i still remember all of you guys.
My life has changed to the better, mostly because I have chosen the best solutions and alternatives for me, but i never forget where I'm from.

Happy New Year and let;s make this year a better year



Tia Phoenixx