Advice for your first meet with a t woman.

[Foxy Basket]

Though you started the thread hoping for advice, you seem to have offered the best advice of all - the cliche-yet-still-true statement of "be yourself" is the only way to go.

One should consider that every t-girl on this forum became the person she is today, simply because she dared to "be herself" in spite of the challenges she would inevitably face. No t-girl ever goes through a transition without expecting at least some degree of fallout; we never know exactly how things will turn out, but nobody expects it to be an easy trip.

One should consider that every admirer dared to "be himself" and admit, accept, and ultimately satisfy his desire to be with a transsexual woman. He knew the conflicts that it might cause for his sexuality, but he still decided to go ahead and take that plunge. He chose to let his desires dictate his behaviour, rather than be led society's antiquated concept of sexual identity.

One should consider that, in a survey of 20 trans-sensual men (aka - admirers), you'll find 20 different reasons for their attraction. There may be common themes among them, common desires and specific acts they prefer - after all, there are only so many things two people can do between the sheets - but there will be 20 different stories, 20 different perspectives, and 20 different routes that brought them to the moment of their first experience.

However, there is one thing that all of us have in common: we're all happier being oursel ves than we ever were before, when we were pretending to be someone else.

It takes great courage to simply "be yourself" in a world such as this. Trans or otherwise, it's never easy to define yourself simply as a person, and cast off those labels that others are so quick to stick to us - those same labels that we're too quick to stick to oursel ves as well.

Stepping outside those boxes can be uncomfortable at first, but so rewarding when you can simply be you. . . without qualification or explanation.

I'm not trying to plug myself here, because I'm sure there are many girls more able to fulfill your fantasies than I am. Different girls cater to different tastes, and simply claiming "great for first timers" doesn't do justice to the incredible range of interests and needs within the vast realm of human sexuality. Some girls are more inclined towards certain desires than others, and different men like different things - my god, consider how boring the world would be if we were all turned on by the exact same thing!

So go out there, be yourself, and act on your desires. They'll never go away until you've satisfied them, so figure out what you would feel comfortable doing, and do it. Find a girl that will help you get through it. Whatever it takes - a glass of wine, some soft lighting, even asking a girl to dance to your CD at a certain bar (no, I haven't forgotten about that one either! ) find that moment where you feel comfortable being yourself, and explore those temptations that have, thus far, eluded you.

Hmm, that turned into a much longer "rant" than I intended; I must still be tipsy from my trip to the bar. Seems strangely fitting, though, given the origin of this post.

Humour aside, I wish the best of luck to all potential first-timers, and I'm sure you'll all find your way.


~Nikki

www.tgirlnews.com - TransMission: Broadcasts from Between the Lines

https://www.shemalecanada.com/escort/tgirlnikki/

[markerverse]

Nikki

Now if your column fails to answer the unanswered for the 'newbees', English comprehension is not their strongest suit.

Well defined points young lady. Thank you.

[Rantsalot]

...

This thread was in the hopes for advice to be given and shared.

Given that I and many people here have been with a t woman and in turn t women communicate with a various group of men all of us are still always "learning" in one way or another so even "vets" can still pick up a thing or two and again, to the 1st timers, hopefully you're getting something from all of this so far.

On a side note. Nikki. I haven't forgot about that "dancing to my tunes" idea either. LOL

[smlvr]

Not a Hallmark card.

At the risk of sounding like a prude, I’m going to use this thread to address something that’s been bothering me ever since I signed up on this site. But first, I’d like to comment on these ill-equipped words of advice. In the following paragraphs, I will switch tangents more times than we’ve all jerked off over ladyboy Amy, but don’t despair, it’s all relevant. However, be warned, some of the proceeding words may sting a little, like your first time. Keep in mind I'm playing the villain on this thread, purely because I'm bored and I've got time to kill.



The all too popular slogan of, “just be yourself”, is fucking terrible advice! These three words are the backbone of a society that doesn’t give a shit about anyone. It’s lazy, it’s unimaginative, and it’s loaded with misguided intentions that, more often than not, have an adverse effect on what it’s really trying to convey. Furthermore, It’s reminiscent of the notorious internet abbreviation, “IMO”, or, “In My Opinion”. Of course it’s my opinion! Who else's would it be?? I didn’t go next door and borrow some opinion from my neighbor because I forgot to buy some this week. Likewise, “just be yourself”, is equally pointless - of course they’re going to be theirself, who else would they be?

“Just be yourself” are not words of encouragement. They’re tools for avoiding the real issue. They’re a quick fix and rarely backed up with anything substantial with the exception of Nikki’s post.

Let me give you an example:

Someone has to get up and speak in front of a large audience and they suffer from stage fright - “Oh, don’t worry, you’ll be OK. Just be yourself”.

Someone has a big game tomorrow and they’re worried at the thought of losing - “You‘ll be fine, just go out there and be yourself”.

Someone has an important job interview and they’re nervous - “Relax, just be yourself”.

It’s like, “Yeah, thanks for those words of wisdom, buddy. I feel much better now. And to think I was going to remain in human form. You’re right, shedding my skin and revealing my true reptilian form is a brilliant idea”.

In this context of first time experience with a shemale, these once meaningful words now innocently and subconsciously aid to instil the idea that what the first timer is pursuing is somehow taboo, that it’s frowned upon, that what they’re doing is somehow morally wrong. Regardless of one’s good intentions, these words have inherently negative implications.

Now to what ails me:-

Judging by a lot of posts I read on this forum, it’s now obvious to me that a lot of you guys actually pay for the experience of being with a tgirl, and that somehow, especially for a first time experience, this is the only option many of you have considered. Sadly, the responses from the tgirls on this forum would seem to support this.

It’s amusing yet understandable that on one hand, some men suffer the apprehension of being with a shemale because of the socially negative connotations that may come with it, yet on the other, you’re happy to fork out money for this forbidden desire. And the tgirls are all too happy to accept it. And why wouldn’t they be?

I can’t speak for the rest of you, and I’m not sure I want to, judging by the severe lack of confidence among some men on these boards, but I’ve never resorted to paying for sex, with shemales or females. Now, escorting is a recognized profession and I have no problem with it, but it’s this very thinking that hinders you from truly experiencing the pleasures of being with a member of the shemale persuasion. I can’t imagine there’s any genuine enjoyment that lingers after you just paid for sex, no matter how good it was. You just fucking paid for it. It damn well better have been good. I mean, surely you’re not all hideously grotesque, nocturnal creatures with two heads or a dead foetus sticking out of your neck with a hunger for shemales.

So, do you first timers want some real advice? I mean some real, cold hard advice?…

GET SOME FUCKING CONFIDENCE!!

Take a page out of the book from the very people you’re trying to fuck. Look at these girls. They’re proud of the fact they’re “chicks with dicks”, and so they should be. But that doesn’t mean you should be gullible enough to pay for it, you weak minded fools.

Allow me to digress for a minute. I’m fortunate enough to live in an inner city suburb of Sydney, Australia. I’m a short walk to the famed Oxford Street, home of the world’s largest Gay and Lesbian (and everything else in between) Mardi Gras. The alternative lifestyles in this area are accepted and embraced under Sydney’s umbrella of cultural diversity. There’s an historically famous shemale nightclub located in this hotspot called The Taxi Club, which I recommend to any shemale admirer who visits. There you’ll find a variety of exquisite ladyboys and gorgeous shemales of all types. Given Australia’s close proximity to Thailand, we have a large Thai community (Thai food is a Sydneysider’s second cuisine of choice when not at home cooking a typically Western meal), so the influx of beautiful ladyboys is rather generous in number. The Taxi Club is where I first met some of my ex tgirlfriends. Now, granted some of them make a living as an escort and some of my shemale friends do just this, but that’s not to say everyone has to pay. Indeed, I never did. My point is this; there is no fucking way 95% of the shemales I browse on the web, searching for that illusive 5% that’s actually fuckable, would ever be lucky enough to lay a hand on me. Think of it like this; they should be paying me. This is, after all, the very attitude they have towards you as paying customers.

So, my more subtle approach to giving advice to first timers is this; if you’re fortunate enough to live in an area where you know there’s a hotspot of shemale activity, then go and check it out. Get amongst the atmosphere. Buy a lovely tgirl a drink, if she doesn’t buy you one first. Don’t be a shy fucking fag. Get in with the community. Embrace it and they’ll embrace you. Don’t be just another outsider. Treat shemales like ordinary females and they‘ll respond to you as such. They didn’t spend thousands of dollars altering their bodies just so you could spend 15 minutes living out your secret, hush-hush fantasy. I treated and thought of my past shemale lovers as biological girls, only when we got home, they had a little something extra to play with. It’s funny, some of my female friends are jealous of our shemale friends. Often they look hotter, dress hotter, and get more action.

The second you give a fuck about what anyone else thinks and let it get in the way of properly experiencing the delights of a beautiful shemale (yes, without your wallet, dickwad), is the second you fall from a potentially awesome sexual encounter. Now why would you want to pass that up? But most importantly, BE CONFIDENT! I can’t stress this enough. Confidence = sex appeal. Sex appeal = … yep, you guessed it. Sex… FREE SEX!

OK, looks go some way to helping too, but this is purely subjective, as everyone has different tastes.

I’m well aware that I’m going against the grain on this forum and probably rubbing some people up the wrong way, thus alienating me from this apparent secret little "group of shame", and no doubt pissing off some tgirls in the process, as they have to earn a living too, but I‘m not trying to make anymore friends. I have them in abundance. Although judging by this forum, the only jobs available for tgirls in Canada are in the sex industry. How they make a living though, is beyond me. I guess Canadian men aren‘t very fussy. Cold weather perhaps, who knows? OOOHH! ZING! Here comes the patriotic backlash. OK, OK, it was a cheap shot, I appologize, but I’m ranting here so just roll with it. Really though, if you can’t detect the tongue-in-cheek sarcasm here then feel free to deconstruct my rant and shoot blanks. Either way, I don’t care.

You see, the thing I’ve noticed about this forum is, it’s full of people being overly nice to each other. I mean sickeningly nice. So nice in fact, it’s disturbing. You won’t find a nicer forum anywhere on the net, save for a book club. What’s wrong with that, you ask? Nothing, on the surface at least. But underneath this innocent mask of civility lies a sinister face of evil. The evil face of shame. Lets face it, if you’re not slinging insults on a forum then something is seriously wrong. It’s half the fun, for god’s sake. Nobody takes you seriously anyway, and your words will be forgotten seconds after they’re digested. This is the human condition of the digital age.

These are merely observations from browsing this forum, but I wish some of you guys would stop tip-toeing around the fact that you’re into shemales and just deal with it already, you fucking pussies. So you like shemales, big deal, so what? Don’t be ashamed of something as awesome as chicks with dicks. It doesn’t make you gay, you nimrods. I mentioned this in another thread, but being attracted to shemales completely contradicts the reason for being gay, as their appearance is clearly and intentionally feminine. If you were exclusively gay, you’d be checking out boys for their physical masculinity, not their tits and neatly packaged bald dicks and smooth feminine asses. Otherwise, WTF are you doing here?

You like chicks? - TICK!

You like your dick? - TICK! Of course you do, you’ve been playing with it ever since you noticed it.

So how about dicks... on chicks? - BINGO!

Think about it. How cools is that? Chicks… with dicks. It's an intriguing combination. Yay! Now you can go play with each other.



*EDIT* Am unable to type "t h e m s e l v e s" as a word because gay little emoticons show up and ruin it. Lame.

[sensual_lover20]

That was an awesome read. I really enjoyed it, I wish you could dish out more of this gold.

[Rantsalot]

...

Are YOU in turn not being yourself smlvr in writing that or is that to be considered a big joke? Sure, be yourself my be not to your liking and as you call it lazy but even cliche has some merit and value. I wouldn't have totally withdrawn the idea, some people agreed.

For the record I don't lack any confidence in any way and I don't regret anything I've done about the topic at hand let alone what I've done. These are only words and unfortunately to you and others who haven't met me all I can ask is to just believe but there are people here who can vouch that what I say is true.

LOL..if you really REALLY wanted the 750,000 word thesis I could've done that but nah...as I look around....this isn't York University or Oxford. For fuck's sake. .... you say this forum is overly nice ...... you spew out some machismo BS .... we're all pussies, we can't come out and admit it....I remember a comment like this before.


O.K. I love shemales, I love everything to do about them, label me all you want I don't give a rats ass, most ladies I have met have been great, the majority of ladies in TO and MTL are probably the best in the world.

Now for my sarcastic retort: Why should we want Australian ladies? Is it to remind us of Olivia Newton John and just burst into singing her extremely horrid song "Physical" and go about wearing ridiculously tight aerobic outfits.


http://new.music.yahoo.com/Olivia-Ne...ical--21785025

smlvr it's easy to dish out feedback but can you take feedback as well ? Push me and I will push back.


This isn't about one up man ship so I'll end my little reaction and say we all know how touchy threads like this can go, usually into verbal wars and they aren't pretty. Obviously not everyone is on the same vibe on or off the forums.

So.....

So smlvr I'll say thank you for your input. I'm sure first timers will take it to consideration just as they will to mine and everyone else's What you said is also true. After all, this thread is about them and for them.

Like smlvr said. Get some confidence.

[Paco]

As for smlvr's comments i can only say right on.

Except for the part about having not to pay.

"I can?t imagine there?s any genuine enjoyment that lingers after you just paid for sex, no matter how good it was. You just fucking paid for it. It damn well better have been good."

If it wasn't good, then that's why we have reviews to help us navigate through uncharted territory.

If it's good sex, then great. The enjoyment is purely physical. If i get what i paid for then great. I'm not paying for love.

I don't want to know shemales outside of a business arrangement that lasts either .5 hrs or 1 hr. We don't know each other from fucking Adam on the street/club/whatever as far as i'm concerned.

Most people in the straight world view Transgendered with either scorn or as freak monstrosities and i wouldn't want to become associated with their ilk.

[smlvr]

I think I struck a nerve... Scalpel!

Paco makes some good points while seeing the lighter side of my rant. In all earnestness, I would sway towards Paco’s thoughts in a purely realistic sense. Not everyone shares my wayward lifestyle. As for Rantsalot’s erm… rant? Can we call it that? I’m not even sure what that was. According to Rantsalot, this isn’t York University… or Oxford. Who knew? Although why he chose those two universities, I have no idea. He scores 2 points for being random, but that's not all folks, it gets better. Stay tuned.

Rantsalot - I’m touched you think my vocabulary is worthy of York or Oxford. This pleases me immensely. Sadly, however, I attended neither. I apologize for making the naive assumption that readers on this forum are educated enough to understand words which you would otherwise find intimidating. I’ll be sure to dumb down my mastery of the English language in future posts… but not this one. Better yet, I just won’t insult my readers by assuming they’re stupid. Calling them names is far more childish and fun.

Given your displeasure at my previous post being an apparent 750,000 word thesis, I’m curious about the inspiration behind your name; Rantsalot. You seem to be contradicting yourself there, as I‘ve yet to see you contribute anything remotely resembling a "rant".

To be brutally honest, Rantsalot, you created this thread, then failed to initially provide anything of substance. Perhaps it’s substance abuse.

Lets see:

Post #1 by Rantsalot - “A long overdue work in progress”. End of post.

Post #2 by Rantsalot - “A long overdue work in progress”. End of Post.

Why you created a thread before you had anything to say, strikes me as just a little bit odd. You see, I’m a logical minded person, so this makes my eyes twitch.

Rantsalot feels compelled to inform me that, “it's easy to dish out feedback but can you take feedback as well ? Push me and I will push back.” I think we can all guess what he’s pushing… ahem.

I had to save the best quote for last though, because this, Ladies and Gentlemen, is fucking gold. This wins the award for the most random comment… ever. This is so random and irrelevant that it goes beyond stupid and enters the realm of AWESOME. It permeates your eyes, lingers in your head, infusing your brain cells with raw confusion, then explodes out the back of your skull. This should be the explanation when you look up “WTF” in the urban dictionary. Forget extreme sports and adrenaline junkies. You want a head rush? Just read this shit:

“Now for my sarcastic retort: Why should we want Australian ladies? Is it to remind us of Olivia Newton John and just burst into singing her extremely horrid song "Physical" and go about wearing ridiculously tight aerobic outfits.”

Fucking awesome, huh? What a rush!

[Lani]

Most people in the straight world view Transgendered with either scorn or as freak monstrosities and I wouldn't want to become associated with their ilk.

Oouchhh!!!

( Hoping that the 'kind' of people you don't want to be associated with... are those straight who viewed Transgendered with either scorn or as freak monstrosities)

[Rantsalot]

Paco makes some good points while seeing the lighter side of my rant. In all earnestness, I would sway towards Paco’s thoughts in a purely realistic sense. Not everyone shares my wayward lifestyle. As for Rantsalot’s erm… rant? Can we call it that? I’m not even sure what that was. According to Rantsalot, this isn’t York University… or Oxford. Who knew? Although why he chose those two universities, I have no idea. He scores 2 points for being random, but that's not all folks, it gets better. Stay tuned.

Rantsalot - I’m touched you think my vocabulary is worthy of York or Oxford. This pleases me immensely. Sadly, however, I attended neither. I apologize for making the naive assumption that readers on this forum are educated enough to understand words which you would otherwise find intimidating. I’ll be sure to dumb down my mastery of the English language in future posts… but not this one. Better yet, I just won’t insult my readers by assuming they’re stupid. Calling them names is far more childish and fun.

Given your displeasure at my previous post being an apparent 750,000 word thesis, I’m curious about the inspiration behind your name; Rantsalot. You seem to be contradicting yourself there, as I‘ve yet to see you contribute anything remotely resembling a "rant".

To be brutally honest, Rantsalot, you created this thread, then failed to initially provide anything of substance. Perhaps it’s substance abuse.

Lets see:

Post #1 by Rantsalot - “A long overdue work in progress”. End of post.

Post #2 by Rantsalot - “A long overdue work in progress”. End of Post.

Why you created a thread before you had anything to say, strikes me as just a little bit odd. You see, I’m a logical minded person, so this makes my eyes twitch.

Rantsalot feels compelled to inform me that, “it's easy to dish out feedback but can you take feedback as well ? Push me and I will push back.” I think we can all guess what he’s pushing… ahem.

I had to save the best quote for last though, because this, Ladies and Gentlemen, is fucking gold. This wins the award for the most random comment… ever. This is so random and irrelevant that it goes beyond stupid and enters the realm of AWESOME. It permeates your eyes, lingers in your head, infusing your brain cells with raw confusion, then explodes out the back of your skull. This should be the explanation when you look up “WTF” in the urban dictionary. Forget extreme sports and adrenaline junkies. You want a head rush? Just read this shit:

“Now for my sarcastic retort: Why should we want Australian ladies? Is it to remind us of Olivia Newton John and just burst into singing her extremely horrid song "Physical" and go about wearing ridiculously tight aerobic outfits.”

Fucking awesome, huh? What a rush!

A rant basically is to write or speak in an excited manner. Thats a general explanation. I rant as do you smlvr and wellhungone and Barbie and Lisa....we all do. Some just don't see it that way compared to others.

Hey smlvr. it's all about perception. Obviously you perceived me in a bad light from the start. Thats fine. You've made up your mind and its a shame it won't be changed easily

Now...what I said was "I" as in I Rantsalot could've put forth the 750,000 word thesis. I didn't say your story was worthy of such a claim nor do I think what you and I write is literary genius. Please read again. I wasn't displeased at all as I knew where you were coming from but you take it that way. Why? Do you find it enjoyable to undermine things whether how smart or stupid they may be? I was trying to be sarcastic and admit failed miserably. I'm not good at sarcasm. Also , why did you not mention the bit about me stating ''Are YOU smlvr not "being yourself" in writing this?" Right...cliche...one up man ship..I fail to provide flavor and all that.

Personally I think what you've written is just a MILD deviation of the over all fact which you dislike so much in that is to "be yourself" but again people also agree with your statements, I admit it. I can take harsh criticism but still state that if I am pushed I will push back. Hard to show only through words you're not a pussy ....but...meh...what you gonna do?

Alas.... what you see me push lacks anything worth mentioning as you say. Just as I see your statements regarding your little story as helpful to a point, substantial....ummmm....no not really.

Oh well. I've said what I deem is good advice and so have you. In the end we obviously don't see eye to eye and I know where this is going. Belittle me all you want smlvr as I will refuse to respond because even if I do respond.... which I wont.... in the end its not going to matter as to what I write, you'll just mock it and deem it valueless.

The goal of this thread was to help first timers and this thing between you and I will drag on ad infinitum. Hey, you can even claim that by my not responding to you on this thread ...not others but just this one ..... will be because of me being a coward or can't think of anything more to write or some ridiculous negative comment .... etc etc .I have a good feeling of what type of comments you'll leave.

You want to contribute more go ahead....its an open thread. State whatever you think is helpful. I won't interfere.


As for the term Rantsalot it was a radio title I had years ago if you must know...LOL