T4M Toronto - An intro, a proposal and an AMA

[kai_says_hi]

—not seeking folks here at present —-

[curiouslad]

We love a confident queen 👸

[kai_says_hi]

We love a confident queen 👸

That’s not a question. Compliment rejected!

No JK 😉, I appreciate that very much, darling.

[tao1kiku]

Refreshing to see a well thought out post. And great photos as well.

[Cobbler1]

Hello all, very nice to make your acquaintance. I will admit it’s a little bit intimidating to make my first post here but I wanted to give it a shot.

My name is Kai. I’m a trans woman living in downtown Toronto. I have a penchant for romance, dirty vodka martinis and horror movies/games. I am a bit of a nerdy girl. I work full time as a computer programmer.

A few people DM’d me this week to send kind greetings and ask questions after I posted a few times in a thread about M4. I thought a full answer might just be best suited for a longer introduction in a proper post.

The short version

TLDR; Non-SP Transgirl looking to meet people and learn what makes admirers tick. If a dating arrangement came out of this that would be cool too, but I’m happy just to have chats as long as you’ll welcome me here. More pics attached. AMA.

The long version

It’s complicated for me to explain why I’m here. After being familiar with this site and lurking for a while I found myself compelled to try signing up and say hello. While I am not an SP, I have no qualms with sex work or those who procure it. In fact, I respect that men here actually place value on the time they spend with trans women. Furthermore, from reading others’ posts I know some of you demonstrate a pretty evolved outlook on your trans attraction. Someone used the term “Gynephilia” here the other day and I was notably impressed. Given how plastered the term “Shemale” is everywhere on this forum I wasn’t actually expecting people to take the time to write so thoughtfully about their personal tastes. Even the folks who have messaged me have been kind and thoughtful in their communications and I appreciate that a lot.

I have played the dating game for years on most of the notable sites and I find them all a bit ho-hum. Particularly I’m tired of the expectation from guys that I’m just going to want to meet them discretely at my home on a whim because they sent me a cock pic. This isn’t to say that there’s anything wrong with just wanting a discrete one-and-done encounter, but I think it’s in poor taste to be approaching trans women on regular dating sites, ignoring our profile descriptions and talking to us like all we want is to be a fuck toy for someone who puts no emotional or financial investment into our wellness.

So I’ve managed to find myself signing up here because I’m looking for something different than what I’ve been finding elsewhere. I have curiosity about whether there are guys among the ranks here looking for something more than a by-the-hour connection and closer to either like a “Nice dinner dates for fun” kind of thing or some sort of sugar daddy arrangement.

At the end of the day my career is going to take care of my surgical transition costs and I’m not really seeking financial remunerations. I’m mostly interested in feeling appreciated and nurtured. However I think generosity is probably commensurate with just how discrete my connection wants to be. If you want to take me out to dinners/events, spend time and do nice things together I want very little else. If you’re looking to keep our dynamic mostly quiet and limited to intimate encounters, well spoiling should be appropriately generous, though I’d appreciate it in clothing, makeup and spa gifts.

So to summarize the proposal:

I GET - Appreciation and nurturing of some form, either via public activities at restaurants/venues and/or some sort of gift support arrangement.

YOU GET - A trans girlfriend who gives you attention and affection ongoing. Who cares about you 24/7, texts and sends pics when you’re not together. Cheers you on in life.

A little bit more about me and what I like:

• I’m a submissive bottom girl first and foremost. While I’ve never topped a guy before in my life I’m not saying never either. It’s kind of like my last virginity though and I’ve been saving it 😂
• I love dom/sub and Daddy/Babygirl kind of dynamics. Generally I’m an open minded lover with few limits
• I’m basically pre-everything surgical-transition wise, just on hormone therapy for 1.5 years now
• I love fashion and makeup and I’m quite receptive to feedback on things my partner wants me to wear. I actually attribute a reasonable amount of my personal fashion taste evolution to feedback from men. I want to spend energy on looks-maxing
• I also love doing anything for a look, including wigs. My natural hair is in the process of growing out, but I rock it too sometimes.
• I think I’m a very positive and affectionate person overall. I tend toward modesty and have an absolute honesty policy in how I live my life.
• I attached more pics of myself to this post in some different looks, including a natural short-hair demure office girl look 💁♀️

Ask Me Anything!

On the subject of honesty I wanted to leave this post open to any and all questions, as long as they are not too personally identifying for my own safety.

I’m also open to feedback and criticism of my proposition. If nothing else, I thought this post might be a nice break from all the crypto and porn spam and an opportunity for discussion about alternative arrangements with trans girls.

I hope you are all having a good week and thank your reading!

Kisses,

Kai 😘

Great photos. Let's meet up I promise I won't talk politics. haha.

[Luna Morris]

The quality of your blog content is impressive. It’s always informative and useful. I’m looking forward to your future updates—keep posting!

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[kai_says_hi]

Refreshing to see a well thought out post. And great photos as well.

Thank you! I’ve been trying to write a lot recently life and dating.

I’ll try to post more photos soon 📸

[kai_says_hi]

Great photos. Let's meet up I promise I won't talk politics. haha.

Oh no, let’s go there 😆😝😳 DMs are open for proposals

[kai_says_hi]

Hey, as promised, as few more pics. Some lingerie photos I took last month. I guess there’s no way to upload videos here…

[markyalex1977]

I had not seen this Ty for sharing

[StrokeShow69]

Hey, as promised, as few more pics. Some lingerie photos I took last month. I guess there’s no way to upload videos here…

Thanks for your intriguing post and all of your exquisite photos, especially the "natural short-hair demure office girl look" which I find quite ethereal. Bravo!

[kai_says_hi]

Hi loves, I’ve decided to cool it on seeking dates here for the timebeing. I did manage to have one lovely dinner date and overnight stay with someone who, coincidentally, asked me out 2 hours before I ever made this personal, but not much else has manufactured besides some nice chats.

big thanks for all the lovely and thoughtful messages in my DMs. Some of you have written a lot to me and shared a lot and I feel privileged for those. A few folks have been a little creepy but the overwhelming majority have been incredibly sweet.

In the last couple weeks I’ve been travelling in Europe and I just got a Facial Feminization Surgery consultation in Marbella, Spain, which has put me in a lot of deep thoughts about what I want right now, and who I’m doing my transition for. I’ve also noticed how much more discreet some places are than Toronto and I’m so grateful for the LGBTQ culture in my home city. It’s also made me reflect and realize I need to probably step back for a while and not inject so much of my personal time and energy into alternative dating arrangements as I go through some big changes in my life.

the decision to remove my photos and personal info from this site is not so much a reflection of running away as just diminishing the attention and not letting anyone down if I don’t reply to new private messages, because some of you write very long heartfelt messages to me and I don’t want to waste your time or mislead about where I’m at right now.

i wish everyone here the best on their own journeys of self acceptance and inner peace. The world moves forward for trans folks if we all move forward together and I have the utmost empathy for the challenges of both trans folks and those that admire us.

you can still find me on all the socials and im not completely disappearing, but I will not be active here for the timebeing. I still intend to go to Goodhandys (aka Epochal Imp) from time to time and participate in community elsewhere.

Thanks so much. It actually saddens me a bit to write this because I hold no ill thoughts towards TGF and its members. I’ve learned a lot in a short period of time and in its own way being here has helped me know myself just that little bit better than when I arrived.

i hope to meet some more of you out abroad in the city in future and please never feel shy to tell me you came to know me first from this website.

hugs and kisses,

Kai 😘