Should Escorts be able to be picky?

[Ray]

I hesitated to post this but I thought it should be known. I also know that this topic has been discussed in the past.

Anyway, that being said, I have always thought that a certain Provider was really hot so I decided to send her an email telling her what I was looking for. She replied with the following: hi there how old ru? u gotpic. Based on that, I knew I didn't stand a chance so I replied back that I was a customer of Lucy, Lisa, Nikki and Meme and that I felt that if I was good enough for them, I was good enough for anyone. I also replied that because of her attitude, I was no longer interested.

[Batman]

I for one can tell if a girl is patronizing me, or if she's really into things.
I'd prefer the truth up front, because I'd rather not choose a provider who is just 'tolerating' me. We all have our tastes and we deserve to. I too am also very picky about who I'm with.

I don't believe a sex worker is obliged to accept a business arrangement if she doesn't want to, for any reason. Having said that, I think the girls who love men and sex in general regardless of age/body/looks tend to have a broader range of loyal clients who give repeat business.

So in the end it's really up to the girl whether she wants to run this like a hobby or like a business.

[Ray]

Hey Admin, Thanks for your thoughts on this subject. In view of what you said, I have a few additional comments.

"Would you rather have a crappy experience or just know up front she is not into you."

In reference to this, I like to think that acting is part of the job. I know damn well that the girls I have been with would probably prefer to be with someone much younger, better looking and with a much bigger cock. But they all made me feel like I was greatest while I was with them and for that I am most appreciative. I used to photograph and videotape weddings. Is it more fun photographing someone that is model material as opposed to someone who looks like Janet Reno (if anyone remembers her), you bet, but you do it anyway because you are being paid. You tell the ugly bride she looks great ( I never could lie and tell her she looks beautiful), and do your job to the best of your ability. Sometimes you could challenge yourself to make her look better than she really was. So, it is my opinion that as long as someone is clean and smells fresh and not morbidly overweight, the SP should grin and bear it and make a considerable amount of money in a short period of time.

[toban]

Just be thankful she has spared you from costly disappointment.

I know nothing of Ms X but as far as I am aware she has an excellent reputation.

In regard to any escort, I consider her to be a private contractor. No contractor is obliged to undertake any job, especially when they feel they can not perform that job satisfactorily.

The same applies to the service providers. Girls who care for their reputation and who know their personal limit of client acceptability will not be able to provide you with the level of service such as you expect.

Don't take her refusal personally. Move on and be thankful she has spared you from a costly disappointment.

Better yet, consider the reverse - you are forced to visit an SP that does not appeal to you. Could you perform in a cheerful enthusiastic way if that were the case?

[cooldude]

Ray, don't let anyone tell you are not a gorgeous man. Plenty of other fish in the sea. Her loss, not yours!

[Ray]

Cooldude, I agree, her loss, but even I know I am not a gorgeous man, lol. But then again I have seen much worse.

[maddplotter]

There might be a small, very small chance, that she is screening for bad dates from the past. I'm sure you're a nice guy Ray, but face it, some of these girls might have met some creepy guys out there.

[Ray]

I think VERY SMALL CHANCE Madd. I seem to recall that she used to have something about this subject in her ad. I many be wrong about that, but her reply did not take me by surprise.

[tireless_69er]

I agree somewhat however it could have been a lot worse I suppose.... she could have given you a quick and unsatisfied service to just get you off and get you out. At least you saved your money this time for another that could do you right so to speak. I would have more of a problem with someone who takes your money and does a mechanical job or doesn't even finish.

[Wiseone26]

It's like looking for a restaurant for dinner, You are not going to go to a place you get a "uh..." type feeling. It's like buying a car, you are going to shop around until you find one that you like.

But on the providers side of things, yes she is entitled to screen, maybe she wasn't feeling well or maybe she was just having a bad day.

Too many guys take stuff personally ie age, availability, timing. Until there is money exchanged there is no expectations to be made. Now if you pay for sex and it isn't up to snuff well that is different.

It's just sex, there is alot of other girls out there.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4PNO-qymLQ

[tslisaparadise]

I agree somewhat however it could have been a lot worse I suppose.... she could have given you a quick and unsatisfied service to just get you off and get you out. At least you saved your money this time for another that could do you right so to speak. I would have more of a problem with someone who takes your money and does a mechanical job or doesn't even finish.

ive been alittle hesitant to weigh in on this post because my name was mentioned but as an escort i do pick and choose during phone calls if i get a call and im not sure about there tone then i wont book and let them know that shemalecanada has a ton of girls although i dont care what the guy looks like i find that very distastefull to pick and choose on looks but thats my opinion.its like car shopping if i talk to a salesman and get a cold vibe i wont spend my money ill wait to find a salesman who im comfortable with its my money i worked hard for it and i wont give it up unless im getting exactly what i want so why would you guys be any different looking for a compatable sp?

[kristopin]

of course

ive been alittle hesitant to weigh in on this post because my name was mentioned but as an escort i do pick and choose during phone calls if i get a call and im not sure about there tone then i wont book and let them know that shemalecanada has a ton of girls although i dont care what the guy looks like i find that very distastefull to pick and choose on looks but thats my opinion.its like car shopping if i talk to a salesman and get a cold vibe i wont spend my money ill wait to find a salesman who im comfortable with its my money i worked hard for it and i wont give it up unless im getting exactly what i want so why would you guys be any different looking for a compatable sp?

Lisa i agree with you whole heartedly. all excorts have the right to choose who they will accept and screen. this is just plain simple in my mind. if you dont feel comforatable then why take a chance. your safety comes first. if you find a customer that satisfies you then all for the better.

I am glad you liked me. last time i was new, next time will be great,

[Foxy Basket]

The short answer? Yes, we should

I'm also a bit hesitant to weigh in because, like Lisa, I've been named in this thread. Again, like Lisa, I'm rather picky; I decline a lot of requests based on the attitude of the person e-mailing me. Things are a lot better since I created my site, and I made it very clear how I arrange appointments, but I still get plenty of e-mails from people who just don't get it. Oh well, their loss.

But the question on the table is, "Should escorts be able to be picky?" and the answer is, yes, we have every right to pick and choose our clientele. Lawyers can choose not to represent a client for many reasons - perhaps they don't feel they can win the case, or they don't want to represent a guilty client. When you consider that escorts also have major safety and privacy concerns to deal with, it becomes that much more important for us to screen our clients as we see fit.

I don't think it's a matter of debate whether we should be picky, because every person should be able to choose who fucks them - and there aren't any "fuck police" out there to enforce anyone's expectations.

I have never declined anyone because of age, appearance, and certainly not due to cock size - I'm much more interested in how your e-mail is worded. Sometimes, this has the indirect effect of working against people with poor English skills, but my site is very clear in how I expect potential clients to act, regardless of their native tongue or writing ability.

I'll even check up on potential clients who know me through here; remember my first response to your e-mail, Ray? There's a reason I chose to see you instead of other guys who contacted me. truck was a perfect example; I declined his initial request because I saw his "shemales are only good for fucking" post, even though I'm sure he's younger than you are, and he's a total top. He might even be the type of guy who I would find physically attractive, but his personality was so unattractive that I wouldn't even let him fuck me for money. We might screen clients based on different criteria, but I assure you, it's something that every escort has to do to some degree.

Any guy who has seen me knows how professional and accommodating I am, in terms of communication, service, and attitude. But this isn't an easy job to do; it takes its toll on your psyche, especially if you feel you're doing something you don't want to do because you really need the money.

But that's part of the long answer; please keep reading if you want to understand why we might decline an appointment.

[Foxy Basket]

The long answer - why we do

Ray, I apologize if this becomes a bit personal, but your situation displays something unique to the trans sex worker niche that isn't often understood by clients - the expectations that come with having a cock. I'm going to divulge a bit of information about our communications, in hopes that it helps others understand things a bit better.

A lot of potential clients assume that, because I have a cock, I should be able to fuck men with it. I've never enjoyed doing that, and I enjoyed it progressively less with each attempt, until I eventually despised the very thought of it. I love fucking women, and always have, but I've never been the least bit interested in fucking a man's ass. Adonis himself could walk through my door tomorrow, but if he asked me to top him, I still wouldn't do it.

Ray, I'm afraid you have the distinction of being the last guy I ever tried to top, or ever will. I have no problem with your interest in the act, but it's not something that appeals to me. At first, I figured, "give it a try, you're helping someone feel a pleasure they enjoy, nothing wrong with that" but that didn't work. Then, I figured, "why not, it'll increase your client base and your income" but that didn't work either. In fact, it made me feel worse; I was doing something I didn't like simply for the money, instead of getting paid to do something I genuinely enjoyed doing. That's where I drew the line.

After our last session, I felt like I had tried as hard as I could, but I just couldn't do it anymore. I immediately removed "versatile" from my list of services, thanked you for your donations and support, and suggested that you examine your other options to enjoy the experience you desired. There was no amount of acting I could do to convince you I enjoyed that particular act, and even though the money is considerable, I really didn't like how it made me feel - I actually started hating that aspect of sex because of it. (Luckily, it was only a brief interlude; I resolved this minor issue, and I still love sex as much as ever!)

Ask yourself: how much money would it take for you to give up all sexual enjoyment for the rest of your life? How much is your love of sex worth to you? How much would someone have to pay you to make you hate sex, and everything surrounding it?

Sure, we all do things we don't want to do, often for money - that's part of life. But you were also asking me to use a part of my body that I don't particularly like, to perform an act that I don't particularly like. Like many transsexuals, having a cock isn't my preference, it's merely my circumstance. I try to make the best of it; I enjoy receiving pleasure through that part of my body, but that doesn't mean I love having it there; if I could wish it away tomorrow without all the complications that come with surgery, I'd do it in a heartbeat. But as it is, it remains the sole part of me that allows me to work in this industry - and the sole reminder of who I was forced to be for all those painful, pre-transition years. You're self-conscious about your cock, as many men are; well, multiply that self-consciousness by 1000, and then you'll understand what gender dysphoria feels like - that's what many transsexuals feel on a daily basis.

Remember Haley? I miss her, and I hope she's recovering well from her surgery, but she hit the nail on the head on this topic. A lot of girls are in this business only to pay for their surgery. They use their cocks to raise the money to get rid of them - to have them transformed into something that fits our minds. Many of them hate doing this, hate that part of their body, and hate knowing that it's the one part of them that guys are interested in. If you have to deal with those feelings, day after day for years at a time, it's bound to take its toll. Surely you'll start screening out guys that want you to use it on them.

Don't assume you're being screened because of age or appearance - perhaps you're just asking her to do something she doesn't like doing, and she'd rather wait for someone who wants the same thing she does.

Escorts screen for a variety of reasons, and sometimes, people will feel offended because they think they're being singled out and excluded. But the reality is, the more specific you are in your desires, the harder it will be to find someone who meets your expectations. Lisa, Lucy, Meme and I were all ok with your age, appearance and size - surely there are others out there who will also be able to provide the experience you seek. The more detailed your needs, the harder you have to look - keep digging and you'll find someone who can give you exactly what you want.

[tslisaparadise]

A lot of potential clients assume that, because I have a cock, I should be able to fuck men with it. I've never enjoyed doing that, and I enjoyed it progressively less with each attempt, until I eventually despised the very thought of it. I love fucking women, and always have, but I've never been the least bit interested in fucking a man's ass.

holy crap its amazing how we actually think the same on this subject great post kiddo