Ltr

[Rockheart]

You appear to be sifting through trash and expecting to find diamonds, so to speak.

Not sure what this means?
Are you saying all tgirls I have met are trash?

Not sure why I am implicated here?
Just giving my observations from 20 years on the scene.

[Rockheart]

I would say that may be true of the younger, pretty girls ,under 30 anyways, who want to make hay while the sunshines and also not be tied down to one guy. And many of them are still in the Club scene and party til you drop stage. So older guys who want a tamer lifestyle and quieter life wonder why these girls aren't interested in guys 20+ years older. Besides the attraction to the more youthful looking women they have nothing in common and what interest would young women (TS or GG) have in older greying wrinkling guys other than $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$s

I am not saying it is an age thing at all, except that some girls choose older sugar daddies over younger guys.

I am saying in general the tgirls will go for a no-account thug type guy with no money or job, over a less thuggy guy with a job.
But like I say generally they are just looking for sex and not any type of relationship.
Tgirls are just not going to have the same nesting instincts as a GG, and their clock doesn't tick down.

I fully understand why a young girl wouldn't date and older guy.
However I don't understand why a tgirl would turn her nose up at a nice, handsome guy with a job.
However they do.

Sure you can say you are in the club scene or whatever excuse you have but there is no logical reason to date some loser over nice guys. You can say they are a "bad boy" but seriously if you are turned on by guys that are lazy and cocky you need to reassess. They are just lazy thugs, how is that attractive? To me a real "Bad boy" is one that is successful and chooses to live life on the edge in someway or another.

The fact is I could show any girl more excitement than many a fraction of my age.
I am in better shape than most my age or even half my age.
I barely have a wrinkle, I think calling every older guy wrinkly is a little rude.
(In fact, many of the most desirable men on earth are over 40 - Brad Pitt, George Cluny, etc etc.)
But that is not really my point.

My point is most tgirls don't want a relationship for various reasons.
They may date losers just for the fact they won't fall in love, that is only thing that makes sense to me.
Why else would they put up with abusive losers.
Probably putting too much weight on sex for excitement, the truth is the most excitement you will have in life is not sex related.
Sex is something ANYONE can do.

My fiance is 26 which is younger than me.
I didn't specifically look for someone this young, it just happened to be who I fell in love with.

[TSFantasia]

Escorting & LTRs Not Mutually Exclusive Terms

I don't think escorting and LTRs are mutually exclusive terms. If a girl maintains a heavy travel/tour schedule then yes. But for most resident SPs their schedule is no where near as packed as someone who is going from city to city for 2 or 3 days and trying to pack 8-10 appts a day in. I've dated and been in relationships ever since I started to transition and escort. I've never looked for the bad boy type in fact they are a turn off for me. I like a guy with a good job, who doesn't find it a hardship to go out for dinners and drinks because he is living paycheck to paycheck. At same time I'm not looking for anyone to pay my rent, car pymts, etc.

I never disrupt a date night for an appt request. The guys I have seen know I'm an escort and they also understood the concept of an open relationship or at least that people can have sex without emotional attachment. The guy I'm dating now owns a farm has a high paying career besides, is 20 yrs older than me but so far has treated me like a queen. The only thing he has asked about my escorting is if I ever need a 3rd he would be happy to help out..lol.

BTW Crag congrats on your engagement

[VanessaBell]

Not sure what this means?
Are you saying all tgirls I have met are trash?

Not sure why I am implicated here?
Just giving my observations from 20 years on the scene.

I'm saying that you're looking in the wrong places. The traits that you mentioned in your posts are all specific to a particular subgroup of people in general, which you're misappropriating to trans people as a whole.

[Locomotion]

I'm saying that you're looking in the wrong places. The traits that you mentioned in your posts are all specific to a particular subgroup of people in general, which you're misappropriating to trans people as a whole.

Well, the dude DOES own quite a few tg escort sites ... I imagine he mainly knows a lot of TG escorts on a personal level (not the small percentage out there that do not escort), so I think I would tend to agree with him from what I've seen as well.

But I wouldn't call them trash, I think that word is a bit harsh. It's their life, their choice. Each to his/her own. The ones who are attracted to the low life lazy thugs will most likely out grow it over time out of shear boredom and will look for someone with more substance as they mature.

BTW congrats too on your engagement Crag!!

[VanessaBell]

Well, the dude DOES own quite a few tg escort sites ... I imagine he mainly knows a lot of TG escorts on a personal level (not the small percentage out there that do not escort), so I think I would tend to agree with him from what I've seen as well.

But I wouldn't call them trash, I think that word is a bit harsh. It's their life, their choice. Each to his/her own. The ones who are attracted to the low life lazy thugs will most likely out grow it over time out of shear boredom and will look for someone with more substance as they mature.

BTW congrats too on your engagement Crag!!

I'm more just arguing that the escorts etc. are the small percentage, which obviously may not seem to be the case to somebody who generally just associates with that group of people. It's a larger ratio in comparison to the non-trans population, sure, but it's still just an extremely visible minority that people automatically associate trans people with due to societal conditioning. This is specific to first-world countries of course, as elsewhere it'd be the other way around due to the much harsher degree of discrimination.

[Tia Phoenixx]

Why is it so hard to find a tgirl that wants a LTR?

actually it's very easy if you know how to approach us.

Most of us are longing for a relationship.

You just have to know how to approach us.
Interested to know more? I will explain later...i'm too sleepy tonight

good night

[sadeh]

real world

The real world is surreal for tgirls, and the shemale world is surreal for men, so its only fitting to know that it is just easy to enjoy life with a nice tgirl , rather than to look for someone you make belief.

[TSFantasia]

for every 100 guys that say they wanna date a tgirl, I truly feel that only 1 of them is serious.

The other 99 just wanna have sex with trannies behind closed doors in the dark of night... god forbid someone see the guy out with a tgirl in the light of day!

These guys will tell tgirls ANYTHING to get them into to bed.. FOR FREE is what I'm getting at.

They just want free sex, and will sugar coat it like there's no tommorow... and if the tgirl/tranny does put out, the guy will satisfy his needs, kick her out of bed, and say "dont u ever fuckin' call me again u faggot"
How do I know this? well... isn't that an easy question?


Thats why I tell guys I meet in person/online "u should go get your mom to blow u"

That's pretty rough I haven't had anything that extreme happen have had a few guys almost tripping over themselves as they get dressed headed toward the door! It's hilarious at times to see the Dr Jekyl/Mr. Hyde transformation in guys before and after they cum! Guys self denial in many cases is dangerous as a high percentage of assaults and even murders of trans women is at the hands of their "boyfriends" or guys they were seeing when the arrangement/relationship goes south and the guys then fear being "outed"

[Tia Phoenixx]

Sad but true...thanks for sharing sisters.

Passability plays an extremely important role in order for us to be accepted in society, including the acceptance by men.
It's indeed crucial that we have to do our best to look as passable and pretty in order to be fully accepted. Unfortunately, life is tough and unfair.

I keep telling myself: "don't judge the book by the cover", unfortunately as a human being, even me, i'm still drawn by hot, good looking men too.

But the good thing is, on the long run, personality will trump over physical attributes, so for me personally, though it's nicer to have a good looking man but if he has an average look, that's fine too as long as he's caring, smart, having good sense of humor and can accept me the way I'm.

It hurts me too when I read or witness a man who mock a girl who is not passable, and i do my best to defend the girl if I could, like i did on TER transsexual board (i hope i'm allowed to post the link here)
http://*************************/dis...&page=4#105295

I think we, both the girls and the men who love us, have to have a common understanding and relevant criteria for finding an ideal partner.
It's laughable if a 60 years old man searching for 21 years girlfriend. And believe it or not, most men are literally looking for much younger partner.

And the girls, o well, we don't do better either. Most of us, are looking for wealthy, famous, good looking, hunk men to accompany us.

we will end up disappointed if our criteria based on superficiality like that.

If we can be relevant and understand our limitation and set our goal for finding an ideal partner accordingly, I think we will get a partner very soon.

I'm pretty sure I can get a partner within a year or even few months, if i stop and retire from the industry.
He might not be as good looking as Chris Evans, or as hunk as Mike Tyson, or as smart and wealthy as Bill Gates, but hopefully he will be real and compatible to me.


So the key to find a great partner is compatibility.
That's why we call him/her a soul mate right?

[Locomotion]

Nice guys finish last

for every 100 guys that say they wanna date a tgirl, I truly feel that only 1 of them is serious.

The other 99 just wanna have sex with trannies behind closed doors in the dark of night... god forbid someone see the guy out with a tgirl in the light of day!

These guys will tell tgirls ANYTHING to get them into to bed.. FOR FREE is what I'm getting at.

They just want free sex, and will sugar coat it like there's no tommorow... and if the tgirl/tranny does put out, the guy will satisfy his needs, kick her out of bed, and say "dont u ever fuckin' call me again u faggot"
How do I know this? well... isn't that an easy question?


Thats why I tell guys I meet in person/online "u should go get your mom to blow u"

Thats awful, sounds like that guy was just another immature selfish asshole (too many out there for my liking...). Don't let it sour your view of all men, Candy.

I think the main problem is that the nice guys out there (and there ARE a lot out there too) just aren't very good at approaching beautiful girls ... Especially when there's a chance of getting shot down and humiliated in public. They sometimes end up saying the wrong thing to the girl, then regret it later.

Also, for most nice guys, seriously dating a working escort would be out of the question. It happens, but usually ends badly...

[TSFantasia]

Thats awful, sounds like that guy was just another immature selfish asshole (too many out there for my liking...). Don't let it sour your view of all men, Candy.

I think the main problem is that the nice guys out there (and there ARE a lot out there too) just aren't very good at approaching beautiful girls ... Especially when there's a chance of getting shot down and humiliated in public. They sometimes end up saying the wrong thing to the girl, then regret it later.

Also, for most nice guys, seriously dating a working escort would be out of the question. It happens, but usually ends badly...

I will keep you posted Actually if I got to a serious stage in a relationship I would give up escorting completely. Which may be one of the reasons that T-girls look at the guys income because as shallow as that seems transitioning is expensive and does the guy have the income to pick up the slack if the girl quits escorting and takes a regular $10-$15/hr job ?

[Tia Phoenixx]

I will keep you posted Actually if I got to a serious stage in a relationship I would give up escorting completely. Which may be one of the reasons that T-girls look at the guys income because as shallow as that seems transitioning is expensive and does the guy have the income to pick up the slack if the girl quits escorting and takes a regular $10-$15/hr job ?

me too.
However, having a bad experience being dump in the past, i truly have to be careful with whom i finally say YES and not regret my decision later on.

So the best bet is: keep working till I have enough money to retire forever. Urg....it's tough for sure.

back to work now

[candyhilton]

thanks everyone for the comments.
It's a slippery slope with tranny chasers, and after what I've been through with these wonderful men, the only advice I can give any other cd/tgirl is... question what he REALLY wants vs. what he presents himself to be

I'm happy that I'm done (for good) with pretend straight guys... and I can just enjoy myself when I go out for a night at Goodhandies and that there is no expectations (now) when I go there (other than to have a gay old time with my friends )

[TSFantasia]

Sad but true...thanks for sharing sisters.

Passability plays an extremely important role in order for us to be accepted in society, including the acceptance by men.
It's indeed crucial that we have to do our best to look as passable and pretty in order to be fully accepted. Unfortunately, life is tough and unfair.

I keep telling myself: "don't judge the book by the cover", unfortunately as a human being, even me, i'm still drawn by hot, good looking men too.

But the good thing is, on the long run, personality will trump over physical attributes, so for me personally, though it's nicer to have a good looking man but if he has an average look, that's fine too as long as he's caring, smart, having good sense of humor and can accept me the way I'm.

It hurts me too when I read or witness a man who mock a girl who is not passable, and i do my best to defend the girl if I could, like i did on TER transsexual board (i hope i'm allowed to post the link here)
http://*************************/dis...&page=4#105295

I think we, both the girls and the men who love us, have to have a common understanding and relevant criteria for finding an ideal partner.
It's laughable if a 60 years old man searching for 21 years girlfriend. And believe it or not, most men are literally looking for much younger partner.

And the girls, o well, we don't do better either. Most of us, are looking for wealthy, famous, good looking, hunk men to accompany us.

we will end up disappointed if our criteria based on superficiality like that.

If we can be relevant and understand our limitation and set our goal for finding an ideal partner accordingly, I think we will get a partner very soon.

I'm pretty sure I can get a partner within a year or even few months, if i stop and retire from the industry.
He might not be as good looking as Chris Evans, or as hunk as Mike Tyson, or as smart and wealthy as Bill Gates, but hopefully he will be real and compatible to me.


So the key to find a great partner is compatibility.
That's why we call him/her a soul mate right?

Female attractiveness & even a trans woman's "passability" is a very subjective and relative term. While many t-girls aspire to the Victoria Secret, S.I. Swimsuit model level of looks and body type the truth is even in the genetic girl world this is a rarity and small percentage of women. That's why these women are paid multi-million dollar modelling contracts to help companies sell fashions, cars, perfumes, etc. etc. as they represent the fantasy idealized woman that the average woman just can't attain. In the real world of genetic women there is a huge variety of body types and facial features that don't pass when measured against this idealized standard. ie large noses, square jaws, etc. yet they are women nonetheless and there's also a wide range of men at different levels of attractiveness and body type that fall far short of the masculine ideal too to match.

Some would say that trannies and t-girls are just a guys fetish and nothing beyond that but if any guy is into a certain type of sex or sexual fetish it only makes sense to couple up with a girl or t-girl that matches those sexual desires.

To me the biggest barrier to t-girls finding meaningful LTRs is that the men who desire them are more interested in protecting their straight, hetero badge at all costs and since dating a T-girl calls that into question (rightly or wrongly) they would rather keep it on the down-low. "What will people, friends, family think?" was the excuse for not marrying outside of your church denomination, religion, or ethnic group in the past. Opposition to inter-racial marriages then gay marriages all have become a thing of the past (yes I know there will always be elements of bigotry and religious fanaticism about these issues even in the year 3000!!). It seems being in a relationship with a trans woman is the last bastion of bigotry and public shaming that guys are still buying into. There's a saying "My Momma told me that you will live a long time after someone looks at you funny."

Some think that's what I am doing in some of my posts by suggesting that men involved with T-girls have other than straight, hetero sexuality. My point is why should you give a shit about what others think or what labels they put on you. They should be able to just laugh and say "whatever if that makes me technically bisexual or gay I don't care I love t-girls!" But the fact is they do care and so they retreat into the closet. Sad for them and sad for us t-girls too.