Shaming Men Attracted to Trans Women & Its Harmful Effects

[rider014]

Where did it start?

I'm not going to speak for anyone in the larger centers because I'm not going to pretend that I know. I can only go on what I've been subjected to in my isolated neck of the woods.
My very first glimpse of a t-girl was in Australia 20some years ago. She was gorgeous yet no one gave her a tag, shemale, t-girl or anything at that time. It wasn't until 10years later with the good ol dial up internet that I again discovered the "shemale" (I don't like that term) So for the next few years the only association I could see with a T-girl was in porn. Now just lately with the technological advances, the world of t-girls has exploded faster than society can absorb them, a form of culture shock if you will. Sadly, if you were to ask 100% of the men in my area, they would associate t-girls with porn and escorting. So where does the "shame" come into play? My best uneducated guess would be that these men don't want to be seen in public with these girls because society's perception immediately would turn to the sex trade in some way shape or form and bypass any idea that maybe... just maybe, this could be a wonderful loving relationship or just two friends out for the evening.
For only being on this forum a short time, I have learned more about the struggles in society these girls have and can only hope that the "explosion" into society can fast track their acceptance so the the term "shame" can disappear. Will it happen in this generation? Who knows. I believe the hardest part will be to disassociate t-girls from the public's views as sex symbols, porn stars and escorts.
I had the fortunate opportunity to have a short visit/ breakfast this morning with a t-girl friend. (Sorry about the cheesy breakfast Hun, still better than what was downstairs) I turned a blind eye to the escort because I just wanted to see HER, the person. I couldn't stay long because of work, but I did promise that the next time I went to her city, we would be going out wherever she wanted, assuming she doesn't feel ashamed to be out with me as there will be absolutely no shame on my part and I'm really looking forward to it.

[Hockeydude89]

Yes but this article does not seem to touch on the biggest issue I have found.

This is that TS women do not appreciate men that are attracted to them.
They say no "Tranny Chasers" and "Straight Guys Only" .
If you don't want guys that like you what the hell do you expect?

If you are pre-op and guys like your cock, who the heck do you think will be attracted to you.
If they like pussy they are not going to be interested in you, so why the stupid rules.

If you want men to like you for who you are then if you have a cock they are liking you for who you are.
Your cock is part of you. They cannot appreciated the pussy you do not have.

I fully understand that some are not happy there were not born genetic women but that is life.
If you cannot accept the people that are attracted to you for who you are, then you are never going to find anyone.

The fact is straight guys that don't like TS will never like pre-ops.
The chances that they will like a post-op is pretty low too.

Why can you not accept the guys who like you?
How is that supposed straight guy better than a guy who really loves you and is attracted to you?
What are you really proving?

You pretty much just said everything I have been thinking over the last few years. I agree totally with you, and also with the ariticle itself. In my opinion, if you like cock whether it be on a man or a woman, you are anything but straight. I identify as bisexual. I'm attracted to trans women (pre-op) but I also love pussy. If I were to say I was straight, I would be lying.

I find it contradicting when a trans woman complains about how they cannot find a guy who wants to be with them, and then shames men who are attracted to trans women. What the hell do you want? It's a huge contradiction.

I go in and out of feeling guilty for my attraction...sometimes I feel like I am a bad person, because so many of these girls feel so strongly that guys like that are "sick" or "perverts." I don't mind being called a chaser, I guess it goes beyond just that.

[TSFantasia]

You pretty much just said everything I have been thinking over the last few years. I agree totally with you, and also with the ariticle itself. In my opinion, if you like cock whether it be on a man or a woman, you are anything but straight. I identify as bisexual. I'm attracted to trans women (pre-op) but I also love pussy. If I were to say I was straight, I would be lying.

I find it contradicting when a trans woman complains about how they cannot find a guy who wants to be with them, and then shames men who are attracted to trans women. What the hell do you want? It's a huge contradiction.

I go in and out of feeling guilty for my attraction...sometimes I feel like I am a bad person, because so many of these girls feel so strongly that guys like that are "sick" or "perverts." I don't mind being called a chaser, I guess it goes beyond just that.

On what planet is this happening!! Girls getting angry and shaming guys showing interest in them for a dating relationship ie going out for dinners, drinks, going to movies, dance clubs etc. I'm not psychic or anything but I'm pretty sure this reaction from girls (GG or trans) comes in response to guy's attempts to get booty calls, quickies, let's be FWBs minus the friendship of course, fuck buddies, buying a girl one drink then saying let's get out of here cuz your lips would look really good wrapped around my cock! (Slap, splash-drink in face).

Internet porn has turned the majority of guys into drooling idiots with no manners or social skills when it comes to communicating with women. My girlfriend (GG) and I use a similar dating site and are always swapping stories about guys feigning interest only to be trying to talk about sex or our fav positions, etc. after the 2nd message.

So how many trans women have you dated or tried to date in your city? Hockeydude, Crag , others? off a regular dating site or TS Dating site where they have clearly stated they are looking for a dating relationship and that is how you have approached them?? Just curious as my comments are based on a 100 dates with guys off of dating sites. And BTW of those 100 guys only a handful ever got past first base due to a majority getting cold feet at the last min and making excuses why they couldn't make it, another chunk who were brave enough to go on a public date but then gave up after they realized I wasn't going to wrap my lips around their cock in the ladies washroom after 2 drinks. And I've yet to see any girls saying "Straight guys only" on their TS dating site profiles and if they do they are meaning guys who view them as women not as a dude in a dress who has a raging boner to want to fuck guy's asses

[TSFantasia]

I'm not going to speak for anyone in the larger centers because I'm not going to pretend that I know. I can only go on what I've been subjected to in my isolated neck of the woods.
My very first glimpse of a t-girl was in Australia 20some years ago. She was gorgeous yet no one gave her a tag, shemale, t-girl or anything at that time. It wasn't until 10years later with the good ol dial up internet that I again discovered the "shemale" (I don't like that term) So for the next few years the only association I could see with a T-girl was in porn. Now just lately with the technological advances, the world of t-girls has exploded faster than society can absorb them, a form of culture shock if you will. Sadly, if you were to ask 100% of the men in my area, they would associate t-girls with porn and escorting. So where does the "shame" come into play? My best uneducated guess would be that these men don't want to be seen in public with these girls because society's perception immediately would turn to the sex trade in some way shape or form and bypass any idea that maybe... just maybe, this could be a wonderful loving relationship or just two friends out for the evening.
For only being on this forum a short time, I have learned more about the struggles in society these girls have and can only hope that the "explosion" into society can fast track their acceptance so the the term "shame" can disappear. Will it happen in this generation? Who knows. I believe the hardest part will be to disassociate t-girls from the public's views as sex symbols, porn stars and escorts.
I had the fortunate opportunity to have a short visit/ breakfast this morning with a t-girl friend. (Sorry about the cheesy breakfast Hun, still better than what was downstairs) I turned a blind eye to the escort because I just wanted to see HER, the person. I couldn't stay long because of work, but I did promise that the next time I went to her city, we would be going out wherever she wanted, assuming she doesn't feel ashamed to be out with me as there will be absolutely no shame on my part and I'm really looking forward to it.

Your probably right here as most dating sites (POF, Match, Cupid, EHarmony, etc.) do not have a category for trans women as it is assumed any "dude in a dress" is just being kinky and looking for sex hook-ups so please go to a sex hookup site like adultfriendfinder please. So of course as you said this is the only context guys or the public see trans women (escorts, porn, kinky dudes in dresses on sex hookup sites). The TS Dating sites are run and directly link to all the "Tranny" porn, webcam, and chat room sites ,so again that's the assumption guys are making as to why these "na?ve" trans women are posting dating relationship profiles.

Thanks for the coffee and cinnamon bun and btw you have nothing to prove to me as my comments are about guys in the dating world not any expectations I have from clients who are attached and discretion is a must.

[bb420]

Isn't there other ways to hook up besides dating sites?
I have no idea how humanity reproduced before the internet was invented.

Where do TSs actually hang out? Because I don't think I've ever seen one in person(with the exception of escorts).
TSs are an extremely small minority.
I might be open to date a TS, but there's just not that many of you out there.

I don't really like internet dating, I'm too much of a shallow superficial asshole and it's too easy to make decisions based on appearances.

Am I supposed to troll gay nightclubs to find one? Not really my kind of scene.
Or do I just ask women at straight bars if they're carrying an extra piece? I dunno...

And If I do find a TS girlfriend, does that mean I'd have to "come out" to everyone?
Or assuming that she's passable, do I just keep it a secret? Don't ask, don't tell.

Of course, if I'm truly in love with the person, I wouldn't care what anybody thought.

[dom r]

We, as a society, have not created a space for men to openly express their desire to be with trans women. Instead, we shame men who have this desire.We tell men to keep their attraction to trans women secret. In effect, we?re telling trans women that they are only deserving of secret interactions with men, further demeaning and stigmatizing trans women.

I?ve stood witness to many so-called scandals where passing interactions with trans women spawn hundreds of headlines, particularly for a man with fame and social capital. Thousands of words have been dedicated to analyzing whether such and such famous man is now suspect, merely because he took a photo with a fan who happened to be a trans woman. This questioning has led many well-known men to adamantly defend their heterosexuality and has tarnished the reputation and careers of others.

When a man can be shamed merely for interacting with a trans women ? whether it be through a photograph, a sex tape or correspondences ? what does this say about how society views trans women?

This pervasive ideology says that trans women are shameful, that trans women are not worthy of being seen and that trans women must remain a secret ? invisible and disposable. If a man dares to be seen with a trans woman, he will likely lose social capital so he must adamantly deny, vehemently demean, trash and/or exterminate the woman in question. He must do this to maintain his standing in our patriarchal society. For a man to be associated with a trans women, in effect, is to say that he is no longer a ?real? man (as if such a thing exists) because he sleeps with ?fake? women (as if such a thing exists).
This anti-trans woman ideology is harmful, misogynistic and pervasive.

It?s important that we begin truly accepting trans women as who they are, women. We are not objects to have secret sex with, to discard and to laugh at.We are worthy of being seen and are not dirty or shameful.

That is excellent writing there Shyla!!!

Theres a 4 letter word that describes why alot of society members treat trans women, transvestites(no prejudice from me here but err im only attracted to women and trans women),or even men(im not attracted to men either)with long hair with prejudice and shame(including shame towards the men who date trans women), the word doesn't begin with an f, it begins with an h, its called hate. Very or most often they(trans,etc) are not treated with equality and are not even hired for jobs. Whens the last time you saw a trans woman, especially trans women who appear to look a bit more manly, including transvestites or just men with long hair work for CNN or other news channel as a news announcer on t.v.? It doesnt exist. Why? There are endless 100% females with long hair on those news channels but not 1 man with long hair or trans or transvests, why? Because of their prejudice,hate and fear, thats why. Fear being the other word dat begins with f. These 3 words is what they have towards them and the question is WHY? Err do I have long hair, sometimes a bit. If they(society,gov,courts,etc) have these 3 words against them then that can only mean they have those same 3 words against all male genders or men as well in 1 way or another since the similarity between a trans woman and a man is the dic.(it just looks prettier and lustable on a woman).To a large extent they hate,fear and are prejudice against da dic especially when its connected to the masculine kind which is men. Did YA know, single men that are seated close or next to children in a plane,train or bus are actually asked to find another seat? This happens, why because of those 3 words.

And to prove men are heterosexual when seeing trans women is very simple. They(me) would gladly pay $150 to $200 to suck her cock,double oral or do cock on cock(no anal or analed for me,thanks), BUT they(me) would not be with a man FOR FREE. Even if da man pays me, no thanks. I just proved im heterosexual and have no shame for women. Yes trans women ARE women. Theres a wide variety of women with all different kinds of genitalia, even with 2 of them....or 3 of them? errr no unless they can have 2 dics and a cun. hahaha.

[Gypsy1955]

Heterosexual bisexual

By definition bisexual man is defined as a man who is attracted to or engages in sex acts with other men...including transexuals. If a person hates transexual because they are TS, it is called transphobia.

Too bad, I realize my playing days with transexual were short lived and over.

I wish the the ladies the best and that we continue to see the stigma and phobias against them disappear as more and more TS ladies bring their natural tools (brains) to the forefront and educating the rest of us.

[Guest]

...Too bad, I realize my playing days with transexual were short lived and over.

I wish the the ladies the best and that we continue to see the stigma and phobias against them disappear....

Hi Gypsy ,
Woa! Woa! Woa! Slow down, there, laddy. What's this you say?

Are you saying that this thread has made you decide or realize that you will never meet another t-girl again? Not even me?

Are you serious or just playing around?





Babe,
xoxo

.

[Gypsy1955]

Lmao!!

.

Jeez Babe I wish I could do some of that computer stuff...sooo cute!! You make me laugh and smile. Lol!

I would love to meet you, your charming personality jumps through the screen! But I think I could take you out to a restaurant (that serves vegan) when you're not too busy. We could have a chat and some wonderful conversation. See...I'm not afraid of who's looking at me especially in the company of a fine woman If that would be ok with you? Be forewarned...I'm a gentleman, suit will be worn by me, I open doors and slide chairs for ladies and I'm a better listener than conversationalist!

I guess this thread made me look a little harder (and in the mirror) at the whole situation. I try to stay happy, not take life too serious and enjoy it while I can. What I'm starting to see is that for 3 or 4 hundred clams I see myself as an abuser of some vulnerable people that have to act and pretend to enjoy what they do. I'm on their, side but I can't be an abuser.

WOW!! That's waaaaaay too serious! But yes, it's true. Lol, Babe that is sooo cute :-)

[rider014]

Netflix

By definition bisexual man is defined as a man who is attracted to or engages in sex acts with other men...including transexuals. If a person hates transexual because they are TS, it is called transphobia.

Too bad, I realize my playing days with transexual were short lived and over.

I wish the the ladies the best and that we continue to see the stigma and phobias against them disappear as more and more TS ladies bring their natural tools (brains) to the forefront and educating the rest of us.

You remember that movie on netflix? You know, when the guy was down? Remember what the other guy said? Well THAT'S what I'm saying!
There are so few of us on here, we can't afford to lose anyone. Take a little pause, do some yoga to clear the mind(that's what I do shhhh don't tell anyone) come back refreshed and enjoy the chat and have some fun with it

[TSFantasia]

GAWD we can't afford to lose ANY TOP guys!!

Jeez Babe I wish I could do some of that computer stuff...sooo cute!! You make me laugh and smile. Lol!

I would love to meet you, your charming personality jumps through the screen! But I think I could take you out to a restaurant (that serves vegan) when you're not too busy. We could have a chat and some wonderful conversation. See...I'm not afraid of who's looking at me especially in the company of a fine woman If that would be ok with you? Be forewarned...I'm a gentleman, suit will be worn by me, I open doors and slide chairs for ladies and I'm a better listener than conversationalist!

I guess this thread made me look a little harder (and in the mirror) at the whole situation. I try to stay happy, not take life too serious and enjoy it while I can. What I'm starting to see is that for 3 or 4 hundred clams I see myself as an abuser of some vulnerable people that have to act and pretend to enjoy what they do. I'm on their, side but I can't be an abuser.

WOW!! That's waaaaaay too serious! But yes, it's true. Lol, Babe that is sooo cute :-)

Your one of the good ones Gypsy in my books anyways so stick around . And being raised Catholic and then a stint in Evangelical Churches after High school that's what I said every time I masturbated or slipped into a cross dressing moment "Never again LORD, Never again!!!"" Lol.

[Hockeydude89]

On what planet is this happening!! Girls getting angry and shaming guys showing interest in them for a dating relationship ie going out for dinners, drinks, going to movies, dance clubs etc. I'm not psychic or anything but I'm pretty sure this reaction from girls (GG or trans) comes in response to guy's attempts to get booty calls, quickies, let's be FWBs minus the friendship of course, fuck buddies, buying a girl one drink then saying let's get out of here cuz your lips would look really good wrapped around my cock! (Slap, splash-drink in face).

Internet porn has turned the majority of guys into drooling idiots with no manners or social skills when it comes to communicating with women. My girlfriend (GG) and I use a similar dating site and are always swapping stories about guys feigning interest only to be trying to talk about sex or our fav positions, etc. after the 2nd message.

So how many trans women have you dated or tried to date in your city? Hockeydude, Crag , others? off a regular dating site or TS Dating site where they have clearly stated they are looking for a dating relationship and that is how you have approached them?? Just curious as my comments are based on a 100 dates with guys off of dating sites. And BTW of those 100 guys only a handful ever got past first base due to a majority getting cold feet at the last min and making excuses why they couldn't make it, another chunk who were brave enough to go on a public date but then gave up after they realized I wasn't going to wrap my lips around their cock in the ladies washroom after 2 drinks. And I've yet to see any girls saying "Straight guys only" on their TS dating site profiles and if they do they are meaning guys who view them as women not as a dude in a dress who has a raging boner to want to fuck guy's asses

From what I have read on most other forums, from what I have heard from watching certain vlogs from girls on youtube, that is how it is. Especially on youtube I have seen a few girls talk trash on guys interested in that sort of thing....I'm not saying that all of them are this way. I have yet to date a t-girl, and hell, I'm HOPING to find someone who isn't like that. If I could find someone who would believe me when I say I would like to take them on an actual date, that would be fucking sweet. I just go by what I've heard from about 80% of the people, vlogs and forums I have been to. On the other hand...THIS forum seems to be filled with a lot of people who are NOT like that. This is why I said I'm sure NOT ALL girls are that way. I've spoken to a lot of people on here who are all very nice and not judgmental at all.

That's probably why I like this website so much.

[Guest]

My scrap book. My book of dreams

Hi Gypsy,

I would rather cook you a nice meal at home.
I used to work in professional kitchens.
I know what they do in there and some of it makes me .

We can cook together, in my kitchen.
I'll be the chef and you can be my "helper" and my bun pincher and food taster - did i mention "bun pincher"?... oh, yes, i did mention bun pincher.
We gotta make sure the buns are just right - just warm enough so that when we spread the "butter" on them, it'll melt.
Wouldn't you like to butter my buns?

And it's true, i am a vegan, i don't eat raw meat...well, unless it's attached to a man.
In which case i don't bite it... i'll just slowly suck out the juices.

See?... this is me, and there's you asmy 'testes'-taster. Do a good job, now, because the "HEAD" chef always keeps heron things. You can always spot the HEAD chef because she's the one with the dirty knees.



And this is us .




This ♪ is LUCKY ♪ you.
See ♪ the ♪ happy ♪ face as ♪ you ♪ work? That's ♪ because ♪ i am on ♪ knees, ♪ kneel ♪ ing in front ♪ of you. ♪ YOU are so HMM MMM LUCK_KEY!!! Look! Look!
OKAY! OKAY!!...this is lucky MEEEE, then, and THIS is lucky you .


...... .............................................

Here's us after dinner. This is us , , -->you <-- me, and you--><--me.





And in a few years, this is me with our kids... while you are out hunting for nuts, carrots and those dangerous cabbage heads.

And here's me when our kids are sleeping . See my maid outfit?

Here's you saying that you will leave your wife .
Here's me when i see your nose grow .


What are ya waiting for?

Babe,

...........xoxo

.

[Gypsy1955]

The story of our life!

Babe,

...........xoxo

You certainly are a pro-flirt!! I friggin' love it lol! You should be doing animated children's books and dvd's, but you'd have to change the subject! You've got a whole life cycle in there lol.

that sounds like an offer I can't refuse, every bit of it!

PS: I'm a great kitchen helper and don't mind doing the dishes, especially like that! We could have 2 guns blasting!

[TSFantasia]

From what I have read on most other forums, from what I have heard from watching certain vlogs from girls on youtube, that is how it is. Especially on youtube I have seen a few girls talk trash on guys interested in that sort of thing....I'm not saying that all of them are this way. I have yet to date a t-girl, and hell, I'm HOPING to find someone who isn't like that. If I could find someone who would believe me when I say I would like to take them on an actual date, that would be fucking sweet. I just go by what I've heard from about 80% of the people, vlogs and forums I have been to. On the other hand...THIS forum seems to be filled with a lot of people who are NOT like that. This is why I said I'm sure NOT ALL girls are that way. I've spoken to a lot of people on here who are all very nice and not judgmental at all.

That's probably why I like this website so much.

Well I will have to check out those if you have a few links to share . I can see how some trans girls/women who are serious about their transition and heading toward SRS/GRS as soon as possible would not want guys who are attracted to them because of a part that they are getting removed ASAP! Makes sense