A Little Levity

[Rantsalot]

Re: A Little Levity

A pianist was hired to play background music for a movie. When it was completed he asked when and where he could see the picture. The producer sheepishly confessed that it was actually a porno film and it was due out in a month. A month later, the musician went to a theatre to see it. With his collar up and dark glasses on, he took a seat in the back row, next to a couple who also seemed to be in disguise. The movie was even raunchier than he had feared, featuring group sex, S/M and even a jacuzzi. After a while, the embarrassed pianist turned to the couple and said, "I'm only here to listen to the music." "Yeah?" replied the man. "We're only here to see our jacuzzi."

[Robby4u]

Re: A Little Levity

American beer is like making love on the beach.

It's fucking close to water!

[toban]

Re: A Little Levity

Geez, the Forum has become so nasty and humourless these days so here is a little piece of sheet music for those of you can read it. Personally, I could never figure out how to read sheet music so with my violin tucked under my chin I was turfed out of the school orchestra. But this piece I can understand quite easily.

http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x...ationKeyof.gif

I don't care who you are or what kind of mood you're in today, this should lift your spirits!

[Rantsalot]

Re: A Little Levity

While making love a guy tells his t woman lover. "Darling, let's do 68." After saying that the lady raises an eyebrow and says "68 What's that?". Quickly he replies ."You do it to me and I'll owe you one."

[lisa]

Re: A Little Levity

While making love a guy tells his t woman lover. "Darling, let's do 68." After saying that the lady raises and eyebrow and says "68 What's that?". Quickly he replies ."You do it to me and I'll owe you one."

omg i so gotta remember that one lol

[Lani]

Re: A Little Levity

Geez, the Forum has become so nasty and humourless these days so here is a little piece of sheet music for those of you can read it. Personally, I could never figure out how to read sheet music so with my violin tucked under my chin I was turfed out of the school orchestra. But this piece I can understand quite easily.

http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x...ationKeyof.gif

I don't care who you are or what kind of mood you're in today, this should lift your spirits!

Truly! this piece of music, shows us the unadulterated mind of Mr. Toban lol. never seen one before in my music class, ha ha ha! super hilariously dirty! but hey! we're lucky, you can only find this stuff in the tgirlforum. and believe me; it's not only the spirit got lifted by this piece...

[Lani]

Re: A Little Levity

And in time for christmas and to contribute some levities for this Yuletide Season ( and because I can't go anywhere to finish my shopping, due to this extreme weather condition, so i'm stuck here!)


Pedro and Rosita


One beautiful December evening Pedro and his girlfriend Rosita were sitting by the side of the ocean.

It was a romantic full moon, when Pedro said "Hey, mamacita, lets do Weeweechu."

Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon!" said Rosita.

Oh, 'c'mon baby, lets you and I do Weeweechu. I love you and it's the perfect time," Pedro begged.

"But I just wanna hold your hand and watch the moon." replied Rosita.

Please, coranzoncito, just once, do Weeweechu with me."

Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "OK. one time we'll do Weeweechu."

Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang.....

"Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas,
Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year."


MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

NOW GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER!

[youngboy4ts]

Re: A Little Levity

And in time for christmas and to contribute some levities for this Yuletide Season ( and because I can't go anywhere to finish my shopping, due to this extreme weather condition, so i'm stuck here!)


Pedro and Rosita


One beautiful December evening Pedro and his girlfriend Rosita were sitting by the side of the ocean.

It was a romantic full moon, when Pedro said "Hey, mamacita, lets do Weeweechu."

Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon!" said Rosita.

Oh, 'c'mon baby, lets you and I do Weeweechu. I love you and it's the perfect time," Pedro begged.

"But I just wanna hold your hand and watch the moon." replied Rosita.

Please, coranzoncito, just once, do Weeweechu with me."

Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "OK. one time we'll do Weeweechu."

Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang.....

"Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas,
Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year."


MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

NOW GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER!

haha Very funny and Thanks for sharing...

*****************MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!************


Respect!!!

[youngboy4ts]

Re: A Little Levity

Geez, the Forum has become so nasty and humourless these days so here is a little piece of sheet music for those of you can read it. Personally, I could never figure out how to read sheet music so with my violin tucked under my chin I was turfed out of the school orchestra. But this piece I can understand quite easily.

http://i184.photobucket.com/albums/x...ationKeyof.gif

I don't care who you are or what kind of mood you're in today, this should lift your spirits!

Wow this ones the Best High Five to that Pearson who made this music sheet.

Thanks for sharing...
Respect!!!

[Rantsalot]

Re: A Little Levity

Santa's Best Pick Up Line

I know when you've been bad or good ...

..........so let's skip the small talk and get to it sister!

[toban]

What Being In The Union Means

- - - - - - - "Union Rules and Hookers" - - - - - - -



A dedicated AWU union worker was attending a convention in Sydney and decided to check out the local brothels When he got to the first one, he asked the Madam, 'Is this a union house?'

'No,' she replied, 'I'm sorry it isn't.'

'Well, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?'

'The house gets $80 and the girls get $20,' she answered

Offended at such unfair dealings, the union man stomped off down the street in search of a more equitable, hopefully unionized shop. His search continued until finally he reached a brothel where the Madam responded, 'Why yes sir, this is a union house.

We observe all union rules.'

The man asked, 'And if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?' 'The girls get $80 and the house gets $20.'

'That's more like it!' the union man said.

He handed the Madam $100, looked around the room, and pointed to a stunningly attractive blonde.



'I'd like her,' he said.

'I'm sure you would, sir,' said the Madam. Then she gestured to a 92-year old woman sitting in the corner,

"but Ethel here has 67 years seniority and according to our union rules, she's next in standing to take the new job."

[Lani]

Christmas Parrot

One day a man walked into a bar and sat down next to a guy with a parrot
on his shoulder.

The bartender said, "cute parrot, does he talk?"

The guy with the parrot says, "He does more than just talk, watch."
The guy lit a match and placed it under the parrot left foot. Then the
parrot started singing "jingle bells", it was a christmas parrot.

The guy then placed the match under the right foot and the parrot then
started to sing "The 12 days of christmas."

The bartender said, "that's incredible".
He then asked, "what does he says when you place them between
his feet?"

The guy said, "you know I never tried that, let's see."

When the match was placed between the feet of the parrot
the parrot began to sing a familiar tune...
"chestnuts roasting on an open fire."




MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!